


sometimes love is not enough

by punkrocklouis



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Bottom Louis, Daddy Kink, Dubious Consent, M/M, Sad, Top Harry, it wasn't supposed to get this long, its kind of sad, louis has a kid later in the fic, not endgame larry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-09
Updated: 2014-11-09
Packaged: 2018-02-24 18:40:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2592134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/punkrocklouis/pseuds/punkrocklouis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>louis thinks they're getting domestic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	sometimes love is not enough

**Author's Note:**

> title is from born to die by lana del rey

He has been gone for a while; Harry is on business in Italy. Without Louis. He is supposed to be back any day now, though, and Louis misses him like crazy. See, Louis doesn't have a job (he has only just turned twenty one a few months prior), but he lives with Harry and has been for about three years. Harry brought him in when Louis was alone at a bar at age eighteen, being groped by random men wanting a one night stand with a pretty boy to get rid of the stress. Louis had been crying at the time, and Harry had taken him back to his house so he didn't have to deal with dirty men. But Louis was so pliant and submissive around Harry, he begged to be held and crooned and kissed, and of course Harry let that happen.

They've been together so long; they're so _domestic_ these days. Harry would go away for business for a couple weeks and Louis would wait patiently until he returned. And that's what they're doing. Louis is on the couch with a glass of red wine in his right hand. He is watching daytime soap operas, his eyes glazing over the screen tiredly. He just likes to think sometimes. The television wasn't interesting him as much as it usually does, so Louis clicks it off and walks to the kitchen instead. He sets his glass on the counter and starts cutting lettuce for a salad, his thoughts preoccupied somewhere else. He does a decent job dicing the lettuce, and Louis thinks he can be a good little housewife for Harry. The thought makes Louis's head yearn for more. He wants to be Harry's forever and ever.

Harry is thirty three. He is the manager for a business firm cooperation, but often leaves on business trips. He has a boyfriend who is only twenty one. Louis is his name. Harry doesn't really stop talking about him.

It is dinner time on the ninth day Harry has been gone. Louis is making himself spaghetti, knowing Harry would be home at any moment. He has already cleaned around the house, but there's one thing he wants to do but can't without Harry. He wants to surprise Harry whenever he gets home with the beautiful house all cleaned up. So he makes dinner for two, just in case Harry shows up.

And he does, of course. Harry enters the house quietly, but that didn't stop Louis from hearing his mate. Louis coyly walks towards Harry, taking the older boy's cold hands in his, "I made dinner for two tonight." Louis murmurs and stands on his tippy toes to peck Harry's jaw softly. Louis recedes back to his normal height and squeezes Harry's hand gently to urge him to come to the table.

"That looks delicious," Harry smiles and sits in his usual spot at the dinner table. "Did you miss me?" He teases and scoops out a serving for himself.

"I always miss you," Louis says stilly, and although it was fond, his tone is melancholic. Harry feels his heart churn for the younger boy, suddenly feeling sorry that he had Louis put his life on hold for him; a thirty three year old man. Louis never goes out anymore, doesn't have many friends that aren't Harry's mutual acquaintance, and he's supposed to be in college right now but it's all not happening anymore and Harry feels bad. Louis twirls his spaghetti around his fork, saying a soft prayer as he always does (Louis comes from an extremely faithful household, and although he's religious, he doesn't consider himself an extremist like his family) before he took a bite. Harry isn't religious though, so Louis abides by Harry's wishes and keeps quiet when he prays.

Just another thing Harry takes away from Louis.

They eat the spaghetti in silence; the only solace is the metal pang of fork to ceramic plate. Louis looks up at Harry once the two are finished and clears his throat, "I, uh, bought wine. Would you like some?"

Harry nods in return as Louis stands up to collect the dishes, in which Harry replies, "You don't have to do that, dear."

Louis shrugs his shoulders up and down weakly, "Yeah, I do." And Harry still feels bad. Louis says it like he _works_ for Harry, like Harry isn't his boyfriend and (hopefully) husband to be. Harry sighs softly as Louis finishes cleaning the dishes and comes back with a wine opener and the bottle. Two wine glasses are sitting in the center of the table for Louis to have easy access. He expertly twists the device around the cork and pops it open, pouring a half glass for Harry and himself. Harry smiles thankfully and takes Louis's free hand when he gives him the wine.

"Shall we move to the couch?" Harry asks softly and Louis meekly nods, letting Harry take him to the couch. Harry settles on the fancy yet comfortable furniture, patting the hand not occupied by the wine onto his lap. Louis obliges to Harry as he settles on Harry's lap, his legs on the right side of Harry and his back being supported by Harry's strong arm. Louis flicks his hair from his eyes as he looks around the living space. He has an idea. He angles his body and sets the wine glass on the side table (his lips a rosy pink from the red drink) and slowly trails his hand up Harry's shoulder. Harry always wears suits, his job requires him to. Today he has a baby blue tie on, complementing the black suit he has on.

Louis runs his fingers to Harry's collar, touching the knot of the tie in his fingers. His little fingers slowly loosened the tight tie, earning a comforted sigh from Harry. Louis uses his fingers to brush against Harry's jaw softly, leaning in to give it a gentle peck. "Darling," Louis practically purrs under Harry's arms as he wraps them around the smaller, younger boy.

"Yes, bunny?" Harry asks as he raises the glass past Louis's head and drinks the wine easily. Louis trails his lips carefully down to Harry's Adam's apple, the cartilage bobbing as he takes down the liquid. Harry sets the wine glass beside Louis's and wraps his arms tightly around Louis. Louis hums softly in response and nuzzles his head deep in the crook of Harry's neck. "What do you want?"

"I -- nothing," Louis stutters quietly, his pearly teeth biting down between Harry's collar and his neck. Louis slowly moves his legs around Harry, his right and left on either side of the man now. Louis cups Harry's face gently (something the boy rarely does) (Louis usually focuses on the neck and shoulders and cock, but Louis never initiates kisses) (maybe he will kiss him) and slowly leans forward, his hips rutting against the snazzy dress pants Harry chose earlier that day. But Harry is too focused to get a boner at the moment; he just wants his boy to want him as much as Harry wants Louis. Louis brushes his fingers against Harry's cheeks and lips. Louis is so close to Harry, his body literally pressing against the man's as he rocks his tiny little body on Harry's hips. "I just miss you."

"I'm right here, baby," Harry says quietly as he holds the younger lad close. Louis lets out a small noise and flickers his gaze to Harry's lips. "Tell me what you want, bunny."

"It's stupid, Harry," Louis says softly, backing away. But Harry persists and keeps Louis close, looking deep into his eyes, and Louis can't handle it and nuzzles his head into Harry's neck, his hands roaming everywhere on Harry's body. His hands grasp Harry's tie and tugs it softly. Louis slowly kissed the back of Harry's jaw, whispering gently into Harry's ear only a slight seductive tone in his voice, "I... I just wanted to rearrange the furniture..."

Harry's laugh rings through the room, and Louis pulls away, muttering that he said it was stupid. "No, baby, let's rearrange the furniture." He slides Louis off his lap and Louis is so bubbly as he cleans up the wine glasses. Harry smiles softly at his boy, so happy to only be _rearranging the furniture_ , Harry is worried he doesn't have much else to be happy about.

Louis prances around the room, flitting to the couch, then back to where he could examine the whole living space, then to the kitchen bar where it opens into the living room. He looks at Harry with bright eyes and motions him over. Harry walks towards the boy and smiles as the latter explains his ideas, "Maybe move the love seat under the window and the longer couch on the other side? Or we could put the reading chair right in the corner -- no that would look silly." Harry listens as the blue eyed boy rambles on about how he wants the furniture. "Okay, I got it. Move the love seat under the window, turn the little rug around so it faces it, and switch the reading chair and the long couch."

Harry nods and sweeps in to give Louis a sweet peck on the cheek before moving around the couches to lift them. Louis prances over and helps him, of course, guiding him as he moves the couches.

And Louis is at bliss. All their furniture is moved and Louis is finally content with his home the way it looks. He sits on the couch and Harry does as well after coming back from the bedroom to change his clothes into a dark red, fitting sweater and sweatpants. Louis smiles and crawls into Harry's lap, his body conforming to Harry's again when he straddles him. Louis slowly leans in and pecks Harry's jaw, a giggle about to burst from his lips. "Thank you, darling."

"Any time, bunny," Harry says softly, and there's that guilt again, that he's giving too much space to the reliant boy, yet constricting him to go out. Louis does so much for Harry, and all Harry repays him with is moving his own furniture. Harry swallows the doubt in his mind that maybe this relationship isn't sane or maybe he's suffocating Louis. Or maybe Louis will just leave him altogether.

The way Louis's hips are rolling against his as he sucks on Harry's collarbones is slowly diminishing those thoughts from his mind. Harry knows the boy won't leave him, he knows he's not suffocating and he's completely sure they're both sane. But what Harry doesn't expect, however, is when he moves his hands down to cradle Louis's bum, Louis freezes up.

"Harry, I don't want..." Louis whispers and Harry just wants to love him and give back to Louis for doing all these things for him, for giving up so much for him. "I don't want to have sex with you..."

"What? Why?" Harry slowly slides his hands under Louis's shirt and draws him closer. "I want to show you how much I missed you." He says quietly, his hips rolling against Louis as the boy blushes.

"I -- okay," Louis says softly and closes his eyes as he presses his lips on Harry's neck and jaw.

Harry nods and slowly runs his hands up Louis's thighs hungrily. Louis lets out a soft sigh and holds Harry's shoulders when he feels himself being lifted. Harry is taking him to the bedroom. He sets Louis down on the bed stomach down, slipping his own pants and shirt off quickly. He discards Louis's as well with little hesitance from Louis. Harry just wants to show Louis how much he cares. Harry sprawls the boy over his lap, his baby's sultry ass in the air. Harry kneads his fingers into Louis's perky bum before slapping his palm down on the skin.

"D- Daddy, what have I done?" Louis whispers desperately, his legs shaking because the hit was unexpected. He's completely sure Harry wouldn't hurt him without it being justified with something he's done. He feels the tears prickling up when Harry hits him again. "Daddy, I didn't --

"Be quiet, _bunny_ ," The pet name usually made Louis feel nice and fuzzy on the inside, but the way Harry said it was just filled with ice. Louis lets out soft noises and tries to scurry away from Harry with slight desperation. "Do you need to be tied up?" Harry teases and plants his hand onto Louis's already pink ass. A dark red mark appears in the form of a hand, and Louis howls in distress. Harry decides he's had enough and pushes Louis to his knees; the boy fumbles to maintain his balance and part Harry's knees. He takes the shaft of Harry's cock, so desperate to hear those words he hasn't said since four months ago. Harry tangles his hand into Louis's hair, pulling it not so softly. "Pretty slut, think you can beg for me to stop then get greedy?"

Louis looks up then, at Harry, tears slowly rolling down his cheeks, "M'not- M'not a sl- slut."

"Mhm, yeah, just suck, bunny," Harry says in a condescending voice, the voice he only uses when his coworkers are around and Louis is serving them dinner. Louis obliges to Harry and slowly kisses the head of Harry's cock. "Skip the foreplay, baby." Louis nods eagerly and covers his teeth before slowly pulling himself down onto Harry's cock. Harry moans softly and tangles his fingers up inside Louis's hair. But Harry thinks Louis is going a bit slow, so he pushes Louis's head down so he's gagging and sputtering on his cock.

Honestly, Louis doesn't mind the sex. Sure it's a bit rough and a little unnecessary, but Louis wants to please Harry as much as possible before he fucks everything up and Harry breaks up with him or something. When Harry got home, Louis just imagined sweet kisses and slow love, but Harry hasn't even said those words once since he got back. Harry hadn't said 'I love you' since three months before his trip to Italy. He's scared though, Harry is being so mean to him and he is never like that. Was never like that. Louis is kind of afraid he's fallen out of love. So Louis needs to do everything in his power to make Harry stay.

He's so confused, though. Harry never intentionally hurt him like he did when he spanked Louis and threw him on the floor and pulled his hair. It doesn't feel good, and as Louis's throat is getting fucked, small whimpers and whines and grunts escape his mouth. Harry hushes him up and pulls him off the floor, throwing him on the bed carelessly, as if Louis's some ragdoll. Louis lets out a soft sob and curls his body into himself, slightly fearful of Harry and what is going to happen.

"Come here, my beautiful slut," Harry commands and Louis shakes his head in fear. "Little bitch, you're fucking crying."

Louis flinches and pushes his boyfriend away weakly, tears flowing down his cheeks but the boy is afraid to cry anymore. Louis honestly wonders if Harry thought he was into shit like this.

Harry ignores the boy's pleads and gets the lube from the bottom drawer, slicking his fingers up. Harry presses his two digits up at Louis's hole and the blue eyed boy clenches slightly in hesitation and also anticipation. "Tell me what you want, little slut," Harry murmurs and massages his fingers along the tight ringed muscle of Louis's entrance.

"Tell me that you still love me," Louis doesn't mean for that to come out, so he's embarrassed and covering his face. Harry uses that moment of relaxation to slowly enter his boy.

"I love you, my bunny," Harry says, his mask slipping off as he flashes Louis a fond smile and it all reminds Louis of how it was when they began dating. But that mask isn’t gone for long, because as soon as Harry gets his fingers inside Louis, he curls them up and feels for Louis's prostate. The boy over him quivers with the pleasure, the sensitive area inside him getting curiously aroused. Louis is shaking as Harry massages his fingers on the nerve endings, his legs shaking and delicious moans escaping his lips and Louis is still pretty scared.

"How many times can you come for daddy, pretty whore?" Louis permits a sob to come from his lips as Harry says those shaming words as well as press against his prostate.

Louis hisses and his back arches with pain and pleasure as he feels Harry bite into his upper thigh. "I don't want to play!" Louis cries loudly, thrashing and trying to get away desperately.

"Come on, bunny, don't be like that," Harry takes Louis's inner thigh skin between his forefinger and thumb, pinching hard and leaving a red mark under the skin.

"Harry," Louis croaks with a pleading tone. "D- daddy, you're hurtin' me." He begs and tries to bat Harry off him. But with his fingers inside Louis and other hand pinching small pieces of Louis's skin, it is hard to get Harry off of him. Louis is shaking and trying to move away; so bad, Harry couldn't keep his fingers inside Louis. Louis slips off Harry's two digits and in response, Harry slams them back in, jabbing them next to Louis's prostate, which earns him a loud cry from the blue eyed boy. Harry takes Louis's cock in his other hand, pumping rapidly so Louis was coming within seconds with a soft scream of 'Daddy'.

Harry's relentless after Louis comes down, though, his slender fingers still inside Louis as he thrusts them straight into Louis's prostate more. The boy is convulsing now, and if Louis thought it was bad before, it's ten times worse now. Harry's hand that he jacked Louis with slowly makes its way up Louis's chest and into his mouth, the boy so tired and so weak, he obliges to fingers being shoved into his mouth. Louis laps his own come off Harry's fingers and moves his hips dirtily with Harry's other hand, the pleasure overcoming the fact that Louis just came.

Louis wanted to impress his daddy.

Harry plunges his fingers both deep inside of each cavity, one in Louis's throat, the other in his ass. The hand in his mouth curls around Louis's throat and Louis feels Harry's fingers in his bum go deeper than before. He feels his gag reflex act up, and he doesn't want to gag, so he holds it in. When Louis rocks back on the fingers in his ass, the overwhelming sensation hits him and Louis's coming again; this time untouched.

He feels sort of floaty now, never really coming down from his climax. Louis feels Harry around him, but now he doesn't feel scared, he is terrified. Because he can feel himself being ripped apart by Harry's cock, but he can't see, and all he feels is fuzzy and sleepy and he closes his eyes. With the faint flutter of his eyes, Louis passes out while Harry comes inside him. Louis feels so used, so dirty, like a slut. He is still flying high, soft stutters coming from his lips before he passed out ('Daddy, daddy', 'say you love me', and 'yours') and low whimpers after he climaxes for the third time in only a short amount of time. He is blacked out though, so he can't feel himself come the third time; or the fourth either.

Harry doesn't stay with him to recover.

The next day, when Louis is feeling better, he gets up and pulls one of Harry's tees over his head with a soft sigh. He walks into the living room, still nice and new from when they rearranged it the night before (which felt like ages ago). He sits down beside Harry; he is drinking tea and watching the weather on the television.

"Harry," Louis says quietly, but when Harry doesn't respond, he says it more firmly.

"Yeah?" Harry asks and glances down at Louis with eyes full of love and caringness. Louis takes a soft breath and maybe regrets his decision, but he can't back down. He knows how bad this could turn if he didn't stop it now.

"I'm breaking up with you."

Harry doesn't take it as well as Louis thought he would. Louis thought Harry would just brush him off like he has been, always having another thing to go to. Louis just wants to please Harry, but he will _not_ fall into an abusive relationship; no matter how much he loves Harry, he wouldn't do that. But Harry was genuinely concerned, wanting Louis to thoroughly explain why he was leaving, trying to convince himself that this wasn't happening. But it was, of course.

  


Louis was homeless for a while. Just trying to get a job anywhere and staying with some of his friends and close acquaintances was hard on the young lad. Until he met Zayn. Zayn was perfect, not pushing his boundaries and helping Louis through his times of despair and depression. Zayn was a professor for an undergraduate graphic design course, and he was very good at his job. He made a decent pay, and allowed Louis to stay in his house debt free (until Louis was steady enough to pay the bills, though). Louis had created a nest around them, Zayn coming home to hot meals and a pretty boy every night, and he loved it. He loved the housewife feel him and Zayn had, just like he had lived Harry and felt the same. And Louis actually understood that he had to make friends outside of this tight knit relationship for it to be healthy, so he had done exactly that. Zayn loved him, he loved Zayn, but it wasn't as strong as Harry and Louis. They didn't have sex. It was a mutual agreement that Louis was hurt and Zayn was slightly broken from a past relationship, so they stuck to cuddles and soft, hesitant kisses. Life was large for Louis, and as much as he loved his new life, he felt as if something was missing.

So in the middle of March, about a year after Louis left Harry, Zayn suggested adopting.

  


It's March again; rain is panning down on the city streets, half a mixture of thick snow and freezing water. Louis is holding Grey on his hip while he rushes out of the taxi and throws bills at him. Sure it was unsafe, but it was Zayn's unveiling of his students' works. Louis promised he'd be there. Grey covers her head from the pattering rain, nuzzled into Louis's neck. She's four years old; she was three when they got her. She's legally Louis's (Zayn wanted him to have her if they ever split or something happens), but she loves Zayn like her own father. Louis sets Grey onto the carpet to wipe their shoes and holds the girl's hand as they walk quickly towards the conference room where the unveiling would be held. He stands at the near front of the crowd, and then picks Grey up so she could see. She waves to her papa, who waves back enthusiastically. Louis just allows this moment to think about all the great that's happened in his life.

And somewhere during that moment, he realizes he didn't originally want anything like this. He smiles at Zayn anyways. Zayn's speaking about his students, giving a small speech about how he loved teaching them and what a joy they are in class. Grey tugs on the sleeve of Louis's shirt gently, her way of begging for attention.

"Daddy, that man over there is staring at you," Grey murmurs, wrapping her arms around Louis's neck as she glares at the man.

Louis laughs softly, stroking his baby's back while he says to her, "I'm sure it's fine, G." He turns anyways to see if there was anyone staring at him. His electric blue eyes meet a dark green and Louis's eyes narrow. He wraps his arms around his baby a bit tighter, turning with his jaw clenched. Once Zayn's done speaking, Louis timidly walks towards his boyfriend cautiously, not wanting to attract attention from his ex-boyfriend.

Everyone is looking at all the art pieces, Louis is close to tears, Zayn is speaking to someone and hasn't notice how pale his boyfriend is, and the green eyed man is tapping on Louis's shoulder.

"Can I talk to you, Louis?" It is literally six words said by the man, and Louis's voice isn't strong enough to continue.

"Get away from me," Louis tries to say, but his voice cracks and wavers and breaks like a mute talking for the first time. He squeezes his eyes shut; this can't be happening. The man takes Louis's wrist in his hand, but the touch is gentle and caring and concerned, and Louis is overwhelmed. He lets out a useless hiccup, Grey bouncing slightly and giggling. Louis finally looks up at the green eyed man with expectancy. "Please..." Louis pleads for Harry to just let go.

"I just want to talk, give me ten minutes," Harry says and his eyes bore into Louis's. Louis pulls away from Harry with something in his eye that Harry didn't recognize.

"Let me just give her to Zayn," Louis says, referencing to his daughter. "Grey, baby. Do you see Papa over there?" Louis coos and Harry's heart breaks; whoever this Zayn man is, is the father of Louis's kid. The small girl timidly nods, her hands on Louis's face expectantly. Louis grins and a soft giggle escapes his lips about the girl's serious face. "Can you go over there to him until Daddy is done talking?" He's soft, his voice small and cautious. She nods slightly and Louis sets her on the ground, and she trots towards Zayn, reaching her arms up and getting lifted into his arms. Louis smiles softly and turns to Harry.

"Can we talk, in private?" Harry asks quietly, and Louis hesitantly nods his head. Harry takes him by the hand, not interlocking them, just the general touch of them holding hands, and walks towards the back of the room. Louis leans against the wall and crosses his arms with a soft, yet hesitant look. "So you're married now? Have a kid?"

"No, Zayn's my boyfriend," Louis says lazily, already emotionally tired of this conversation. "Grey is my daughter, Zayn just helped with the adoption."

"So he's your sugar daddy now, is he?" Harry swallows, almost afraid of the answer. "Tell me how much better he is than me at _everything_ , will you Louis?"

"Do _not_ talk about my family like that," Louis hisses out, two years of heartbreak and sadness laced with his angry tone. "He is not my _sugar_ _daddy_."

"Seems like it is to me--"

Louis is raging, so he stands straight up, his eyes narrowing, "Don't fucking be like that, Harry. It's not fair. I'm finally fucking happy, happier than I've been in my whole life. I talk to my boyfriend every night, I sleep in the same bed as him every night, I never have to _wonder_ whether he's coming home that night or not. I have a kid; she's the best thing that's ever happened to me. She is the most quiet, intelligent child I know, and she's so beautiful. I'm working, at a shitty restaurant, nonetheless, but it's a fucking job. I get paid, I have a flat and a mate to die for, a beautiful kid and an overall wonderful life. It's not fucking fair. You're not fucking fair, you don't have the right."

"Louis, I'm not here to start fights," Harry resolves into saying, looking around to make sure no one noticed the small scene Louis was making. "Let's go to mine and we can talk there, yeah?"

"No, fuck _off_! You say you're not here to start a fight, but you're instigating me with all these questions, you always fucking have. It's not fucking fair, I hate you," Louis mumbles after his voice crescendoed over the first three words. Harry's heart breaks, shatters to the pieces he still had and broke them with a tiny hammer to make sure it could never be replaced. "You make me question everything, even when I have the perfect life, the best boyfriend, a nice flat, the luxury, I still fucking doubt myself because I left you! I hate how you make me so sick to my stomach, how you would manhandle me and grab me and call me fucking ' _bunny_ ' and hold me like I mean the world to you when you were actually just using your voice to persuade me to stay. I hate how you're always wearing those shitty expensive suits, how you're always on fucking business, and you care about a company more than me." Louis's cheeks have tears splattered on them, a sob escaping his lips. "You don't get to do that, Harry. It's not fair." He sobs and wraps his arms around Harry surprisingly. Harry timidly hugs back, not sure on what the terms of the hug was. He closes his eyes and breathes in the scent of Louis, a smell he hasn't recalled since the day he left.

"Is there a problem, babe?" An attractive young man walks towards Louis with Grey in his arms. This must be Zayn, then. Harry determines he appears nice enough for Louis.

"No problem, Z," Louis says as he pulls away, wiping his nose on his sleeve. Zayn looks concerned, though, so he leans in and gives Louis a soft peck on the head. Louis looks up and smiles softly, "Can we talk when we go home?"

Zayn nods and smiles at the beautiful boy for a minute longer. Harry envies the way Zayn is young and attractive, has a good job, and could actually support Louis. He can't find it in them to try to win Louis back when Louis has the best he can. Zayn walks away slowly, Louis smiling softly and turning back to Harry.

"Louis, I didn't mean to instigate anything, I just wanted to talk," Harry starts, but Louis interrupts him.

"Shut up, Harry," Louis says, taking Harry's hand in his, pulling him into the small corner near the bathrooms. "I'll talk, and you'll listen, okay?" He says assertively, but adds a soft smile at the end to indicate he wasn't trying to be harsh.

Harry nods his head, leaning his full back against the wall and grinning, just waiting to hear what this cute boy has to say.

"I don't hate you," He says it like it's a confession. Harry lets out a soft sneer, not rudely, just sarcastically. "I don't like how you treated me. I deserved better, and now I have it. But now you're back and I have so many feelings coming back to me that I didn't think I still had in myself." Louis hesitantly raises his hand to hold Harry's. Harry is reluctant to hold his back. "It's not fair..." Louis says softly, and Harry understands now.

"Louis, I know how happy you are," Harry starts, but Louis stops him.

"I'm happy, Harry, I swear I am," Louis laughs humorlessly and he looks down at their feet. "But like, when I saw you, it reminded me of how happy I am with you." Louis swallows thickly, pulling back and wiping the useless tears from his eyes. "I know I never said it when we were together, but I love you."

Harry feels his heart skip, feels his brain shut off for a moment, feels his body coming closer to Louis's. He feels the blood rushing through his veins, his will telling him to continue on. The last two years for Harry were shit. They were bland and sad and not lively like they used to be. But during those two years did Harry realize the proper way to love someone. He found out it wasn't how he treated Louis. He treated Louis like some object; some subject to him who treated him as if he were the king. Louis would always cater to Harry's wishes. Harry understands that's not how a proper relationship works.

But then, he stops feeling all these feelings. The adrenaline is gone from his system as his brain waves start operating again, "Louis, you can't say stuff like that, you have a kid, a boyfriend; you have a _life_ ahead of you." Harry feels bad because he sort of, kind of, led Louis on. Harry reluctantly pulls back, away from Louis.

"No, Harry, please," Louis gasps, taking Harry's hands in his. "Please, say it; say it back." He begs and he just wants things to go back to how they were. Harry swallows thickly, a pregnant pause in the air. But before he can speak, Louis does. "I sound fucking crazy, Harry. I swear I'm not. I thought I could make happiness like we had, but I can't. I'm happy somewhat, Harry, I don't know how to explain it, I'm just so sorry, I probably ruined everything. I'm sorry." He sniffles quietly and Harry wraps his arms around Louis.

"It's okay, Louis. We can talk things out, yeah?" Harry says, and Louis looks up at him with these _eyes_ , and, god, Harry loves him.

"Yeah, I'd quite like that," Louis whispers pliantly. Harry smiles and lifts the boy into his arms, carrying him back into the main room where Zayn and Grey were hanging out. They were one of the last in the conference room. Louis shimmies his way out of Harry's arms and takes his daughter from Zayn, going to another area to speak to her. About what, Harry doesn't know.

Zayn clears his throat, smiling brightly at Harry, "Thanks for coming, it means a lot, mate. I didn't get your name, though."

Harry flashes a half smile at the man, "Harry," He contemplates on saying his last name. The only reason he's here, actually, is because this building belongs to him. Before he could choose whether to say his last name or not, Zayn started speaking.

"Harry, like, Louis's Harry?" He asks curiously. Harry is shocked. He didn't know Louis talked about him still, let alone to his new boyfriend. "That explains a lot, yeah. Louis talks about you in his sleep almost every night." Harry's eyebrows raise, and Zayn furthers this, "I can't sleep most nights, so I stay up a lot. Louis will kick his legs and toss and turn, whimpering for you not to hurt him, and that he loves you?" It's definitely a fact, but Zayn says it as if it were a question.

"Things happened," Harry says vaguely, "I wasn't good for him, you are." Harry knows this will be hard, letting go of Louis like this, but he knows it's in good hands.

"He loves you," Zayn insists, looking over at Louis and Grey with a soft smile. "Like, we're dating, but we're not _together_ , if that makes sense. Like an open relationship. He loves other people, and I love other people." Zayn looks down with a half smile. "It's no problem if you want him back, I swear."

"I'm not good for him, I don't think I can give him what he deserves," Harry murmurs. Louis looks up at the two with Grey on his back. He sends a large grin Harry's way, and Zayn notices.

Zayn runs his hand through his hair, "He deserves you, Harry. I don't know you, but I know how much he cares for you. When we started out, he asked me to be his boyfriend first, but I could tell he wasn't loyal to me. Not fully, I mean."

"Talking about me," Louis tsks, his lips curling into a coy smile. He walks up to their conversation, noticeably leaning towards Harry's aura. Zayn and Harry notice as well. "All good things, I hope." He teases, the fear behind the words disguised. He is afraid that Zayn and Harry are conspiring against him, and that he'd be living homeless once again. Things stress Louis out easily.

"Of course," Harry sweeps in swiftly, glancing down at the boy with love in his eyes. Hope is pumping from his veins. "All good things." He echoes.

 

**Author's Note:**

> my twitter is @breadlouist. inspired by born to die and love the way you lie pt 2. this is my first attempt to write in third person, present tense. sorry it sux. (thanks to jordan because she always knows what to say shes excellent ilh)


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